This document outlines the common mistakes students make when writing ad copy for the first time. Review it closely, and look at how we fixed them. Doing so will save you literally hours of rewrites.

1. Creative Copy

Before Comments After (Fixed) Product Info
1.1 GET PAID TODAY 1. This is too vague. It doesn’t provide enough context on what the app is about.
  1. Don’t capitalize every letter - this makes the ad look spammy. | • Get $100 of your paycheck. Today. • Get $100 early from your paycheck. Zero fees. | Type: SaaS Product: Friday – A company that gives you a pay advance. | | 1.2 | Anytime feedback | This is too vague. Hit a specific value prop here, or concisely describe the product. Someone reading this without proper context would have no idea what the product is about. | A survey for NYC’s residents. Quick & anonymous. | Type: SaaS Product:  Elucd – A company that conducts surveys for local government officials so they get a better sense of how they’re performing. | | 1.3 | Tailored retinoids. For the best experience. | This describes the product, but the value prop is too vague. Avoid clichéd and vague descriptions like “best”, “revolutionary” if it doesn’t actually explain a concrete benefit of the product. See the After copy, where there’s a clear value prop: this is the only place where you could purchase this product online. | The only place to get a tailored retinoid online. | Type: Ecommerce Product: Dear Brightly – A company that sells tailored retinoid creams. | | 1.4 | Become the smartest person in the room. | Too vague. This needs to drill into a more specific benefit.  The After copy is much more specific. It leans heavily into the benefit of the product, but would work well if the body copy explains how the product works. | Read a book a week.  Every week. | Type: Course/seminar Product: Brain by Design – A company that teaches you productivity hacks. | | 1.5 | Forget to save for your trip again? Start saving – automatically. | Too long. The creative copy should be max 6-7 words. | Put your extra cash to work. Automatically. | Type: B2C SaaS Product: Astra – A fintech mobile app company that lets you automatically transfer cash between checking and savings accounts. |

2. Headline

Before Comments After (Fixed) Product Info
2.1 Stop losing employees to competitors This is too vague. It doesn’t shed any light into what the product does, or how it solves a particular problem.
The After copy is much more specific. We know what the company offers to do (employee perk programs), and what the benefit is (boost employee morale). Boost employee morale with perk programs Type: B2B SaaS
Product:
Zestful - A company that makes it easy for employers to give out perks and rewards to their employees.
2.2 Anytime feedback This is too vague. Hit a specific value prop here, or concisely describe the product.
Someone reading this without proper context would have no idea what the product is about. A survey for NYC’s residents.
Quick & anonymous. Type: SaaS
Product:
Elucd – A company that conducts surveys for local government officials so they get a better sense of how they’re performing.
2.3 Ride ATV off-road with your kids. Without worrying about rough terrains. Too long. The headline should be max 70 characters. The only safe off-road ATV. For kids. Type: Ecommerce
Product:
Rosso Motors – A company that sells ATV for kids.
2.4. Swap screen time for reading time. It’s that easy. Too much mental friction reading this what the benefit is (reading more books) because people don’t chunk “reading time” as a phrase in their head.
In the After copy, the benefit is much clearer, and we see the bad alternative compared with our solution. Speed-reading isn’t the answer. Habit-reading is. Type: Course/seminar
Product:
Brain by Design – A company that teaches you productivity hacks.
2.5 Create your Goals and Actions, and watch your savings grow. Split the sentence up so the copier is punchier. Create Goals. Then watch your savings grow. Type: B2C SaaS
Product: Astra – A fintech mobile app company that lets you automatically transfer cash between checking and savings accounts.

3. Body

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